I don’t want it to be you

I don’t want to feel

Cause when the storm had passed through

I couldn’t tell if it was real

So maybe this is the second time around

Or maybe this time will change

But please keep my feet on the ground

And keep my heart within range

I need to know I’ll be safe

I need to keep the hurt from coming

But how do you really know

How do you keep yourself from drowning?


Til today

Will it always feel like this?

To hold my tongue

To hesitate

To stay away from what I miss?

Will there ever be a time

Where it hurts a little less?

To see you there

To catch your stare

When you know inside I am a mess

Until that day

I will not say

A hint of how I feel

Because we both know

And we understand

That our love was too surreal

Whether it was true

Or all in my head

Its still the one

That keeps me up in bed

So keep me here

Away from you

Til there’s nothing left

And there’s nothing left for me to do

But to let go of you


Til today

it was real right?

if i still keep what you gave

does it mean i still have hope?

there is a part of me that cannot tell

and cannot cope with letting go

with pictures and poems and letters from you

all stored in my safekeeping

maybe i just need some evidence

that our time was not just me dreaming


it was real right?

Real vs True

Real love is letting go when I didn’t want to

True love is never having the reason to

Real love is sacrificing things to spend time with you

True love is never allowing me to give it up in the first place

So when we meet again face to face

I won’t say i never loved you


It was real in my eyes

But it took a while for me to realize

Our love was real, but just not true


Real vs True

You can’t change the player

Some weird attraction to boys like you

You got that bad boy aesthetic

The desire to dig deep to see what’s true

Your hidden heart of gold is magnetic

But how long will it take me to see

That boys like you just aren’t for me

I shouldn’t have to peel the layers

Or count on crying prayers

For you to come around

I don’t need to change your game

Cause that’s not my job any longer

Cause every time you let me down

It only makes me stronger


You can’t change the player